Wherever You Go, There You Are.

Most of us often suffer from destination disease; we believe changing our environment, status, position, or relationship would significantly change our lives. Although that is possible, it is not a given. If you move to a new city but don’t have an open mind and explore the opportunities in the new city, you will still be who you have always been because wherever you go, there you are. The new city would not magically change you without you deliberately changing. Nothing moves until you move; leadership is an inside-out job.

We all have a choice: get better or bitter, get the lesson or let the situation lessen you, get the message or stay stuck with the mess. It is not what happens to you; what matters is what you do with it; Turn your pain into gain, look in the mirror, not focus on the window, work on yourself and stop comparing yourself with others. Change happens from within not from the outside, you make up your mind how well any situation turns out by the story you tell yourself.

In his classic book, As a man thinketh, author Jame Allen asserted “A man only begins to be a man when he ceases to whine and revile, and commences to search for the hidden justice which regulates his life. And he adapts his mind to that regulating factor, he ceases to accuse others as the cause of his condition, and builds himself up in strong and noble thoughts; ceases to kick against circumstances, but begins to use them as aids to his more rapid progress, and as a means of the hidden powers and possibilities within himself.”

“The outer conditions of a person’s life will always be found to be harmoniously related to his inner state…Men do not attract that which they want, but that which they are.”― James Allen, As a Man Thinketh

There is a story ¹ about a man who moves to a new town to start a new life. He pulls into a gas station where an old man is managing the store. He walks up to the old man and says, “So, I am just moving here. What are the people like around here?”

“What were they like in the last place you lived?” the old man says.

“They were okay, I guess.”

The old man looks at him and wisely says, “Well, that’s probably how you’ll find the people here.”

How true. People who see others as good and trustworthy and who establish good relationships tend to do that wherever they go. Those who think the people in their current location are “no good” tend to expect that in their new place, “people will be nice.” But because they see through the same lens, after a while, the people in the new place don’t look nice at all.

“Wherever you go, there you are. Whatever you own, you are still the same person. Whoever you are with, you are still you. Wherever you work, you are still the same person .”

One of the biggest never-go-back learnings occurs when a person realizes that the resolution to their problems does not lie in finding an external solution, like . . .

• I would be happy if I could just move to a big city.

• I would be happy if I could find a mate.

• I would be happy if I could find a better job .

• I would be happy if I could trade in my spouse.

• I would be happy if I made more money.

People who are happy know that their happiness does not depend on external factors, but internal ones . They know that if they are not happy in a small town, they won’t be happy in a big one until they resolve whatever inside is making them unhappy. As we’ve noted before, they know that unhappy single people become unhappy married people. They know that if they have not found their passion and meaning, no future job can “give” it to them. They know that if they cannot be intimate in their current relationship, they would repeat the same pattern in another one. They know that more money will not make them happy and will not fill the emptiness of their life.

Understand the Statement, “Wherever You Go, There You Are” ²

“Someone once asked Richard, “What are the people like in California?” I asked him, “What are the people like in your home state?” He replied, “Selfish and greedy.” I told him that he would probably find the people in California to be selfish and greedy.

Something wonderful begins to happen with the simple realization that life, like an automobile, is driven from the inside out, not the other way around. As you focus more on becoming more peaceful with where you are, rather than focusing on where you would rather be, you begin to find peace right now, in the present. Then, as you move around, “try new things, and meet new people, you carry that sense of inner peace with you. It’s absolutely true that “Wherever you go, there you are.

Change Yourself and Your Environment ³

If you know that you need to make a major change to your environment, then there’s something you must keep in mind: You must also determine to change yourself at the same time. Here’s why: If you try to…

Change yourself but not your environment—growth will be slow and difficult;
Change your environment but not yourself—growth will be slow and less difficult;
Change your environment and yourself—growth will be faster and more successful.

As you consider changing yourself and your environment, think about the elements that the right kind of growth environment provides:

The right soil to grow in: What nourishes me? Growth.
The right air to breathe in: What keeps me alive? Purpose.
The right climate to live in: What sustains me? People.

The most significant factor in any person’s environment is the people. If you change nothing else in your life for the better than that, you will have increased your chances of success tenfold. So think long and hard about who you’re spending the most time with, for wherever they are headed, so are you.

“If you need to make changes in yourself and your environment, don’t dwell on your past. You can’t change it. Don’t worry about your future. You can’t control it. Focus on the current moment and what you can do now.”

Meditation

Daily Calm with Tamara Levitt – Concerto
It is easy to get caught up in the busyness of life that we barely notice the symphony of sound happening all around us. Mindfulness teaches us to tune into our senses and experience the present with greater awareness and acceptance. Sound, in particular, is a sense we often tune out; the sound of our environment often blends into the background drone. In our practice, we often push sound away but when we make an effort to truly listen, we notice wonderful details like the whisper of maple leaves wrestling in the wind, the concert of lively voices in a crowded cafe.
Sound can keep us wrapped in the present, and it can steer us with warmth and inspiration; when we tune in, we can be nourished by the raspy voice of a dear friend, calmed by the paw of a cat, or entranced by the rumble of a thunderstorm. We often talk about using the breath as a cue to return to the present; we can use our sense of hearing similarly. We can always tune into whatever sounds are echoing, whistling, and buzzing around us; to pull ourselves out of automaticity and into the moment.

Life is a beautiful thing. Pack a bag, make a playlist, watch the world. Don’t speak, just listen – Jon Mayer

Daily Jay with Jay Shetty – Don’t Judge the Moment

Once upon a time, there was an old farmer who had worked his crops for many years.
One day his horse ran away. Upon hearing the news, his neighbors came to visit. “Such bad luck,” they said sympathetically, “you must be so sad.”
“We’ll see,” the farmer replied.
The next morning the horse returned, bringing with it two other wild horses.
“How wonderful,” the neighbors exclaimed! “Not only did your horse return, but you received two more. What great fortune you have!”
“We’ll see,” answered the farmer.
The following day, his son tried to ride one of the untamed horses, was thrown, and broke his leg. The neighbors again came to offer their sympathy on his misfortune. “Now your son cannot help you with your farming,” they said. “What terrible luck you have!”
“We’ll see,” replied the old farmer.
The following week, military officials came to the village to conscript young men into the army. Seeing that the son’s leg was broken, they passed him by. The neighbors congratulated the farmer on how well things had turned out. “Such great news. You must be so happy!”
The man smiled to himself and said once again.
“We’ll see.
When something happens to us, we tend to add immediate value to it – is it good or bad, but we don’t have complete information about how things will ultimately turn out; we never do. Don’t judge the moment; only time can tell the whole story. Judging a moment does nothing to change the outcome, so rather than label an event: good or bad, lucky or unlucky. Accept that it happened, then focus on moving forward. Dwelling on the judgment is counterproductive because we never know what is in store.