Everyone is going through something you know nothing about. It takes someone that is hurt to hurt another person, most hurt is a cry for help by the hurter who is going through pain and the transmission of their pain to other is one of their coping mechanism. It can be very challenging to be at the receiving end of other people’s unhealed traumas. When situations like this occur, as they often will, I try to remember the words of Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius, who quipped in Meditations:

This habit took me a while to figure out, but I am steadily developing a routine around my personal grooming. It is fast becoming one of my favourite daily routines. Grooming (preening) is the art and practice of cleaning and maintaining parts of the body. ¹ Like most people, the first thing I do after waking up is brush my teeth and bathe. After which, I cream my body and comb my heart; that was it for me until recently. After getting some results in my fitness regimen routine through habit stacking, I experimented with going deeper into my grooming using the same approach.

My New approach to personal grooming

• Triggers: Wake up, turn on my Shokz OpenSwim Swimming MP3 – Bone Conduction waterproof MP3 player.
• Immediately start listening to French language learning materials/podcasts/audiobooks.
• Personal grooming routine: Brush teeth, bathe, cream body, comb heart.
• Added grooming routine: Floss teeth, groom beards, shave hair, and apply deodorants plus spray.

Somedays are going to be more challenging than the others. You might be so broke or in debt that checking your bank account has become a chore. You might be feeling shitty because you can’t seem to conquer the addiction or the harmful habit, such as gossiping or complaining about others. You might not like the job you are presently in, or you feel stuck in a toxic relationship. You might be in a codependent relationship wherein you are dependent on others to solve your issues for you. Life can be tricky sometimes; whatever will go wrong will eventually go wrong.

When the going gets tough, we all have a choice to forgive ourselves, bounce bank and keep it moving. Every mess has a message, and everything that might lessen us also has a lesson in it. Whatever you might be going through right now, no matter how tough it seems, you have the agency to turn it around. It is going to be a dog fight, you are going to fall down multiple times, relapse, your emotions are going to get the best of you. You are going to doubt yourself, people are going to doubt you, and the naysayers are going to be loud in your heart, but you have to, at some point, take personal responsibility for your life.

What we often call “overnight success” is a lot of hard work, sleepless nights, roadwork, training, gym reps, swim laps, and relentless pursuit in the dark that just started paying off. Overnight success usually takes ten years or 10,000 hours of deliberate practice in a particular field or endeavour. We get rewarded publicly for what we diligently practiced, mastered and refined in the dark. Success is often not a straight path; it takes a lot of focus, dedication, perseverance, self-discipline, consistency, endurance and patience to achieve anything worthwhile. As coach John Wooden once said: “Success is peace of mind that is the direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best  to become the best that you are capable of  becoming.”

Every day is an opportunity to give your best shot and make progress in achieving your goals. Good better best; never let it rest until good is better, and better is best. The gym is an excellent example of the One More Try mentality; real progress starts when it hurts, and we can feel the pain. Whether running on the treadmill, lifting weights or engaging in other fitness activities, the more we can go beyond our perceived pain threshold, the quicker the progress. Boxing legend and former world heavyweight champion Muhammed Alli was a proponent of this philosophy; he once said: “I don’t count my sit-ups; I only start counting when it starts hurting because they’re the only ones that count.”

Solitude is from Latin solitudinem (nominative solitudo) and Old French solitude “loneliness” (14c.). It is a state of being alone or remote from society. Most of us got a real glimpse of what it means to be alone for a long period of time during the COVID-19 pandemic lock down. Solitude is different from Loneliness: It involves being alone without feeling lonely, while loneliness is often a state of isolation. As the 2020 pandemic showed, solitude can bring out the best in us through more self-introspection or self-awareness, and it can also make us engage in destructive or negative behaviour that might not be in alignment with our ultimate purpose in life.

American tennis prodigy Venus Williams was offered three million dollars on the eve of her first professional tennis tournament. On the eve of playing her first competitive tournament in three years, a Nike executive spotted an opportunity and offered her a lucrative footwear deal. As per the movie King Richard, the Nike deal was only valid before she played her first game the following day. Venus and her family decided to decline the offer as they believed that once Venus began to play, she would attract more lucrative offers. In the movie, Venus’s father, Richard Williams, said:

We don’t rise to the level of our goals and intentions, we fall to the level of our preparation and training. We play the way we train, sweat hard in training and game day will be a breeze. Anytime I tell most people about my newest challenge, such as running a sub-3 hours marathon or participating in my first Iron Man, most people remind me how hard the task is, and I usually smile. I am generally not worried about the challenge because I am constantly training to motivate myself to achieve the goal. As the saying goes, “Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance.”  Whether it is reaching a fitness goal or a business objective, the key is to stay prepared and always be prepared to get the got done.