It is ok to falter on your goal streak, get distracted and wander for a bit but don’t get lost. It is easy to get distracted in a world where technology, gadgets and streams of data and information are always fighting for our attention. Getting lost in the sea of data on social with the somewhat elusive allure for virality, popularity, and influence can be very tempting. We all get lost in this bubble once in a while but remember why you started this in the first place, the algorithms are not optimized to allow you find your purpose, so wander with care and don’t get lost.
We don’t rise to the level of our goals and intentions, we fall to the level of our preparation and training. We play the way we train, sweat hard in training and game day will be a breeze. Anytime I tell most people about my newest challenge, such as running a sub-3 hours marathon or participating in my first Iron Man, most people remind me how hard the task is, and I usually smile. I am generally not worried about the challenge because I am constantly training to motivate myself to achieve the goal. As the saying goes, “Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance.” Whether it is reaching a fitness goal or a business objective, the key is to stay prepared and always be prepared to get the got done.
This is probably one of the hardest lessons that I am beginning to finally learn the hard way. My default is always to try to add value to people’s lives. Still, I found of late that it could come across as “Adding too much value,” as executive coach Marshall Goldsmith noted in his though-provoking book: What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful! Author John C. Maxwell often said, “No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.” Reach for the heart before the heart. Most of the resistance we often get when trying to influence, instruct, teach, and add value to people, usually comes from not first connecting with them where they are.
“People change when they … Hurt enough that they have to, Learn enough that they want to, and Receive enough that they are able to.” – John C. Maxwell
Faith (n.) mid-13c., faith, feith, fei, fai “faithfulness to a trust or promise; loyalty to a person; honesty, truthfulness,” from Anglo-French and Old French feid, foi “faith, belief, trust, confidence; pledge” (11c.), from Latin fides “trust, faith, confidence, reliance, credence, belief,” from root of fidere “to trust,”from PIE root *bheidh- “to trust, confide, persuade.” Faith means believing, trusting in something, and having confidence that everything will work out in the end. Faith is a verb, an action word that requires patience, hope and unwavering belief in yourself and the universe. As General Douglas MacArthur once said, ” Youth is not entirely a time of life; it is a state of mind. Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old by deserting their ideals.… You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear; as young as your hope, as old as your despair.“
In faith, there is enough light for those who want to believe and enough shadows to blind those who don’t.” — Blaise Pascal
If you work hard, what is hard will work, but if you take shortcuts, you will be cut short. There are no secrets to success; you must show up daily, believe in yourself, and execute relentlessly. There is a price to be paid for sustainable long-term success, and that involves doing the work and playing in the long game by seeing the end in mind. We play the way we train. We get rewarded in public for what we repeatedly practice in private. As former boxing world heavyweight champion Joe Frazier once said, “You can map out a fight plan or a life plan, but when the action starts, it may not go the way you planned, and you’re down to your reflexes – that means your [preparation:]. That’s where your roadwork shows. If you cheated on that in the dark of the morning, well, you’re going to get found out now, under the bright lights.”
Until one is committed, there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen incidents and meetings and material assistance which no man could have dreamed would have come his way. I have learned a deep respect for one of Goethe’s couplets: “Whatever you can do or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it.” Begin it now. – William Hutchison Murray
“Pressure is a privilege – it only comes to those who earn it.” — Billie Jean King
American former world No. 1 tennis player Billie Jean King is considered to be one of the greatest tennis players of all time. In her illustrious career, she won 39 Grand Slam titles: 12 in singles, 16 in women’s doubles, and 11 in mixed doubles. One of her most famous sayings is, “Pressure is a Privilege.”
That which you most need to find will be found where you least want to look. -Carl Jung.
Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said, ‘Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.’ To make the needed change in any area of one’s life, one must first become aware that change is necessary. What got you here to where you are will not get you where you want to be. We all set goals or wishes at the beginning of the year, but most of us will not follow through due to many factors.
Somedays will be more challenging than the rest; mistakes will be made, and you might even lose sight of the big picture. Your goals might seem out of reach at the moment, but you have to take it a day, hour, mile, rep, lap, session, and keep showing up daily. It will get tough at some point, which is a sign that you are stretching yourself and moving out of your comfort zone. Giving up will seem like a viable option, but give all you’ve got, and you will eventually crack it. Good, better, best, never let it rest until good is better and better is best; make sure you are doing your best at any given moment, put in the effort and always remember “The best is yet to come,” and you can constantly better your best.
“Though you cannot go back and make a brand-new start by You can start now, and make a brand-new end.“
Every day is an opportunity to start over again with new vigour, making thousands of tiny choices that can lead to sustainable excellence and greatness. We are all given 24 hours, 1,440 minutes and 86,400 seconds to begin afresh, realign our priorities and live our values to the best of our abilities. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift that is why it is called the present. Today is the tomorrow you looked forward to yesterday, seize the day and make today count. Excellence is ultimately achieved by making every single day a masterpiece by showing up daily and doing your very best. Embrace the gift of starting over daily and taking baby steps toward achieving your goals.
In her speech at the 2016 Democratic National Convention in support of Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign, former First Lady Michelle Obama famously said:
“When someone is cruel or acts like a bully, you don’t stoop to their level. No, our motto is: ‘When they go low, we go high’.”
Going High is about being strategic. If your aim is to change, you’ve got to consider if your approach is going to allow change to happen. It means you are thinking of a broader point outside of your own anger, hurt or pain. This is passion matured into purpose. One has to mature one’s passion,
“The master,” an old martial arts saying goes, “is the one who stays on the mat five minutes longer every day than anybody else.”
Stay on the Mat is a metaphor for deliberate practice, the pursuit of sustained excellence, commitment to training and pushing through the roller coaster on the path to mastery. It is often said that we get rewarded publicly for what we diligently practice in the dark. We stay on the mat practicing, honing the skillsets that the marketplace always rewards. We play the way we train; if you cannot practice it in the dark, it will be hard to perform when the lights are on. One of the hallmarks of the highly successful people in the world is their obsession with deliberate practice, commitment to the game and persistence in the face of obstacles. As boxing heavyweight champion of the world, Joe Frazier once noted:
“You can map out a fight plan or a life plan, but when the action starts, it may not go the way you planned, and you’re down to your reflexes – that means your [preparation:]. That’s where your roadwork shows. If you cheated on that in the dark of the morning, well, you’re going to get found out now, under the bright lights.”
In Steven B. Sample‘s book The Contrarian’s Guide to Leadership, he observed that “the average person suffers from three delusions; we believe we are good drivers, good listeners, and think we have a good sense of humour.” We think we are good listeners, but we are always waiting to respond instead of deliberately listening. Listening is one of the most challenging skills that I am always battling to harness. I love sharing my thoughts on subject matters, especially the ones I am passionate about. I am learning to think and take a breath before speaking nowadays and ask myself, “Is it worth it?”. It’s tough to master the skill but I believe with time, I will master my listening skill.
Grief is the anguish experienced after a significant loss, usually the death of a beloved person. Grief often includes physiological distress, separation anxiety, confusion, yearning, obsessive dwelling on the past, and apprehension about the future. Grief may also take the form of regret for something lost, remorse for something done, or sorrow for a mishap to oneself. 1 Grief is a universal human experience that we all must experience at some point. We grieve for different reasons, such as the loss of a loved one, job loss, ill health, divorce, heartbreak, disappointment, etc. Going through grief can be extremely tough with the emotional rollercoaster of pain, sadness, anger, regret, loneliness, dejection and sometimes relief. American essayist Ralph Waldo Emerson once quipped, “ When it is darkest, we can see the stars.
Grief is like the ocean; it comes on waves ebbing and flowing. Sometimes the water is calm, and sometimes it is overwhelming. All we can do is learn to swim. – Vicki Harrison
Success is never guaranteed, but struggle is guaranteed on your path to success. Overnight success usually takes a lot of practice and time. The relentless pursuit of sustained excellence is an uphill journey that takes an average of 10,000 hours. As the saying goes, we get rewarded publicly for what we diligently practice in private. There will be plateaus, valleys of distress, peaks, valleys, and rollercoasters of ups and downs. If you are not feeling a bit of pain, struggle, discomfort and stretching while trying to achieve your goals, you are probably not aiming high enough. The beginning of any goal is usually exciting, the middle is messy, and the journey is rewarding.
“ If our life is a good one, a life of mastery, most of it will be spent on the plateau. If not, a large part of it may well be spent in restless, distracted, ultimately self-destructive attempts to escape the plateau.”
I have been trying to speak French since 2010, and I have tried almost everything. I started out attending a formal school of French Language learning (Nigerian French Language Village) for nine months, immersion in a neighbouring francophone country immediately afterwards (Benin Republic) for six months, and have been listening to French music and podcasts and watching French movies ever since. It’s been a rollercoaster of ups and downs, rapid progress, followed by frustration when I have to speak and I can’t find the words. Thirteen-plus years in, I don’t speak impeccable French yet, but I am not where I used to be. I have had to embrace the plateaus and keep putting in the effort required to speak French like a native. I have had to be patient, persistent, endure, and embrace the struggle. As American Writer Hal Borland once said, “Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence.”
“Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence.” – Hal Borland
The things that are easy to do are also easy not to do.
Author Jim Rohn often said “Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day. It is the accumulative weight of our disciplines and our judgments that leads us to either fortune or failure.” How you do one is thing is mostly how you do everything. Most things that make a considerable effect in our long term growth are usually easy but they are often not easy to do. It is easy to reduce your screen time but it is not easy to feel left out due to the fear of missing out. It is easy to read a book but the challenge is staying consistent and finishing the book. It is easy to go to the gym but the hard part is staying consistent with the practice.
“Success is nothing more than a few simple disciplines, practiced every day; while failure is simply a few errors in judgment, repeated every day. It is the accumulative weight of our disciplines and our judgments that leads us to either fortune or failure.” – Jim Rohn
