Chinese military strategist and author of The Art of War, Sun Tzu, wrote, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” The battle to conquer oneself is a life-long journey, as what got you to become good would not necessarily get you to become great. The key is to lose the battle and win the war. The battle never ends with the vicissitudes, trials, and tribulations of life, but by conquering oneself with self-awareness and self-compassion, the war will be won. As Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said “One who looks outside, dreams. One who looks inside awakens.”
I ran six full marathons in 2022 and another nine in 2023, bringing the total marathons I ran in the past two years to fifteen. I participated in my first marathon in 2013 as an avenue to deal with the grief of losing my closest cousin. Finishing that first marathon in Accra, Ghana, took me over five hours. I have since participated in and finished 28+ Marathons in 19 different cities (Accra (4), Toronto (4), Cotonou (1), Lagos (2), Nairobi, Mississauga, Ottawa (2), Montreal (2), Vancouver, Edmonton, Hamilton, Fredericton, Halifax, Calgary, Manitoba, Regina, Quebec, Victoria and Prince Edward Island. I reduced my marathon finish time from 4 hours+ (pre-2021) to 3:44 in 2022 and 3 hours 20 minutes in 2023. It took a lot of intense training and consistency to pull it off, but it was worth the grind.
Every day is an opportunity to give your best shot and make progress in achieving your goals. Good better best; never let it rest until good is better, and better is best. The gym is an excellent example of the One More Try mentality; real progress starts when it hurts, and we can feel the pain. Whether running on the treadmill, lifting weights or engaging in other fitness activities, the more we can go beyond our perceived pain threshold, the quicker the progress. Boxing legend and former world heavyweight champion Muhammed Alli was a proponent of this philosophy; he once said: “I don’t count my sit-ups; I only start counting when it starts hurting because they’re the only ones that count.”
Solitude is from Latin solitudinem (nominative solitudo) and Old French solitude “loneliness” (14c.). It is a state of being alone or remote from society. Most of us got a real glimpse of what it means to be alone for a long period of time during the COVID-19 pandemic lock down. Solitude is different from Loneliness: It involves being alone without feeling lonely, while loneliness is often a state of isolation. As the 2020 pandemic showed, solitude can bring out the best in us through more self-introspection or self-awareness, and it can also make us engage in destructive or negative behaviour that might not be in alignment with our ultimate purpose in life.
American tennis prodigy Venus Williams was offered three million dollars on the eve of her first professional tennis tournament. On the eve of playing her first competitive tournament in three years, a Nike executive spotted an opportunity and offered her a lucrative footwear deal. As per the movie King Richard, the Nike deal was only valid before she played her first game the following day. Venus and her family decided to decline the offer as they believed that once Venus began to play, she would attract more lucrative offers. In the movie, Venus’s father, Richard Williams, said:
It is ok to falter on your goal streak, get distracted and wander for a bit but don’t get lost. It is easy to get distracted in a world where technology, gadgets and streams of data and information are always fighting for our attention. Getting lost in the sea of data on social with the somewhat elusive allure for virality, popularity, and influence can be very tempting. We all get lost in this bubble once in a while but remember why you started this in the first place, the algorithms are not optimized to allow you find your purpose, so wander with care and don’t get lost.
We don’t rise to the level of our goals and intentions, we fall to the level of our preparation and training. We play the way we train, sweat hard in training and game day will be a breeze. Anytime I tell most people about my newest challenge, such as running a sub-3 hours marathon or participating in my first Iron Man, most people remind me how hard the task is, and I usually smile. I am generally not worried about the challenge because I am constantly training to motivate myself to achieve the goal. As the saying goes, “Proper Preparation Prevents Poor Performance.” Whether it is reaching a fitness goal or a business objective, the key is to stay prepared and always be prepared to get the got done.
This is probably one of the hardest lessons that I am beginning to finally learn the hard way. My default is always to try to add value to people’s lives. Still, I found of late that it could come across as “Adding too much value,” as executive coach Marshall Goldsmith noted in his though-provoking book: What Got You Here Won’t Get You There: How Successful People Become Even More Successful! Author John C. Maxwell often said, “No one cares how much you know until they know how much you care.” Reach for the heart before the heart. Most of the resistance we often get when trying to influence, instruct, teach, and add value to people, usually comes from not first connecting with them where they are.
Faith (n.) mid-13c., faith, feith, fei, fai “faithfulness to a trust or promise; loyalty to a person; honesty, truthfulness,” from Anglo-French and Old French feid, foi “faith, belief, trust, confidence; pledge” (11c.), from Latin fides “trust, faith, confidence, reliance, credence, belief,” from root of fidere “to trust,”from PIE root *bheidh- “to trust, confide, persuade.” Faith means believing, trusting in something, and having confidence that everything will work out in the end. Faith is a verb, an action word that requires patience, hope and unwavering belief in yourself and the universe. As General Douglas MacArthur once said, ” Youth is not entirely a time of life; it is a state of mind. Nobody grows old by merely living a number of years. People grow old by deserting their ideals.… You are as young as your faith, as old as your doubt; as young as your self-confidence, as old as your fear; as young as your hope, as old as your despair.“
If you work hard, what is hard will work, but if you take shortcuts, you will be cut short. There are no secrets to success; you must show up daily, believe in yourself, and execute relentlessly. There is a price to be paid for sustainable long-term success, and that involves doing the work and playing in the long game by seeing the end in mind. We play the way we train. We get rewarded in public for what we repeatedly practice in private. As former boxing world heavyweight champion Joe Frazier once said, “You can map out a fight plan or a life plan, but when the action starts, it may not go the way you planned, and you’re down to your reflexes – that means your [preparation:]. That’s where your roadwork shows. If you cheated on that in the dark of the morning, well, you’re going to get found out now, under the bright lights.”
American former world No. 1 tennis player Billie Jean King is considered to be one of the greatest tennis players of all time. In her illustrious career, she won 39 Grand Slam titles: 12 in singles, 16 in women’s doubles, and 11 in mixed doubles. One of her most famous sayings is, “Pressure is a Privilege.”
Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said, ‘Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.’ To make the needed change in any area of one’s life, one must first become aware that change is necessary. What got you here to where you are will not get you where you want to be. We all set goals or wishes at the beginning of the year, but most of us will not follow through due to many factors.
Somedays will be more challenging than the rest; mistakes will be made, and you might even lose sight of the big picture. Your goals might seem out of reach at the moment, but you have to take it a day, hour, mile, rep, lap, session, and keep showing up daily. It will get tough at some point, which is a sign that you are stretching yourself and moving out of your comfort zone. Giving up will seem like a viable option, but give all you’ve got, and you will eventually crack it. Good, better, best, never let it rest until good is better and better is best; make sure you are doing your best at any given moment, put in the effort and always remember “The best is yet to come,” and you can constantly better your best.
Every day is an opportunity to start over again with new vigour, making thousands of tiny choices that can lead to sustainable excellence and greatness. We are all given 24 hours, 1,440 minutes and 86,400 seconds to begin afresh, realign our priorities and live our values to the best of our abilities. Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, today is a gift that is why it is called the present. Today is the tomorrow you looked forward to yesterday, seize the day and make today count. Excellence is ultimately achieved by making every single day a masterpiece by showing up daily and doing your very best. Embrace the gift of starting over daily and taking baby steps toward achieving your goals.
In her speech at the 2016 Democratic National Convention in support of Hillary Clinton’s presidential campaign, former First Lady Michelle Obama famously said:
Going High is about being strategic. If your aim is to change, you’ve got to consider if your approach is going to allow change to happen. It means you are thinking of a broader point outside of your own anger, hurt or pain. This is passion matured into purpose. One has to mature one’s passion,