Eliminate Non-Essentials.

April 15, 2024 In Musings 5 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Chinese writer Lin Yutang observed in The Importance of Living. “Besides the noble art of getting things done, there is the noble art of leaving things undone. The wisdom of life consists in the elimination of non-essentials.” The path to becoming a whole individual is a lifelong journey that involves trial and error, making mistakes, stumbling on epiphanies and gaining insights into the journey. Eliminating non-essentials in life is essential for living a life of purpose. We live in a world constantly bombarded with data, noise, shallowness and short-term thinking tools.

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ― Ralph Waldo Emersons

Your hurters are your healers.

April 14, 2024 In Musings 8 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Everyone is going through something you know nothing about. It takes someone that is hurt to hurt another person, most hurt is a cry for help by the hurter who is going through pain and the transmission of their pain to other is one of their coping mechanism. It can be very challenging to be at the receiving end of other people’s unhealed traumas. When situations like this occur, as they often will, I try to remember the words of Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius, who quipped in Meditations:

“When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: the people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they can’t tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own – not of the same blood and birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are unnatural.”

Develop a personal grooming routine.

April 13, 2024 In Musings 7 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

This habit took me a while to figure out, but I am steadily developing a routine around my personal grooming. It is fast becoming one of my favourite daily routines. Grooming (preening) is the art and practice of cleaning and maintaining parts of the body. ¹ Like most people, the first thing I do after waking up is brush my teeth and bathe. After which, I cream my body and comb my heart; that was it for me until recently. After getting some results in my fitness regimen routine through habit stacking, I experimented with going deeper into my grooming using the same approach.

My New approach to personal grooming

Triggers: Wake up, turn on my Shokz OpenSwim Swimming MP3 – Bone Conduction waterproof MP3 player.
Immediately start listening to French language learning materials/podcasts/audiobooks.
Personal grooming routine: Brush teeth, bathe, cream body, comb heart.
Added grooming routine: Floss teeth, groom beards, shave hair, and apply deodorants plus spray.

No one is coming to rescue YOU.

April 12, 2024 In Musings 6 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Somedays are going to be more challenging than the others. You might be so broke or in debt that checking your bank account has become a chore. You might be feeling shitty because you can’t seem to conquer the addiction or the harmful habit, such as gossiping or complaining about others. You might not like the job you are presently in, or you feel stuck in a toxic relationship. You might be in a codependent relationship wherein you are dependent on others to solve your issues for you. Life can be tricky sometimes; whatever will go wrong will eventually go wrong.

When the going gets tough, we all have a choice to forgive ourselves, bounce bank and keep it moving. Every mess has a message, and everything that might lessen us also has a lesson in it. Whatever you might be going through right now, no matter how tough it seems, you have the agency to turn it around. It is going to be a dog fight, you are going to fall down multiple times, relapse, your emotions are going to get the best of you. You are going to doubt yourself, people are going to doubt you, and the naysayers are going to be loud in your heart, but you have to, at some point, take personal responsibility for your life.

Create Your Overnight Success.

April 11, 2024 In Musings 7 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

What we often call “overnight success” is a lot of hard work, sleepless nights, roadwork, training, gym reps, swim laps, and relentless pursuit in the dark that just started paying off. Overnight success usually takes ten years or 10,000 hours of deliberate practice in a particular field or endeavour. We get rewarded publicly for what we diligently practiced, mastered and refined in the dark. Success is often not a straight path; it takes a lot of focus, dedication, perseverance, self-discipline, consistency, endurance and patience to achieve anything worthwhile. As coach John Wooden once said: “Success is peace of mind that is the direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you did your best to become the best that you are capable of becoming.”

The road to success is not straight. There is a curve called Failure, a loop called Confusion, speed bumps called Friends, red lights called Enemies, caution lights called Family. You will have flat tires called Jobs, but if you have a spare called Determination, an engine called Perserverance, a driver called Will Power, you will make it to a place called Success.

Trust Your Joy.

April 10, 2024 In Musings 7 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Joy (n.) is derived from Old French joie “pleasure, delight, erotic pleasure, bliss, joyfulness” (11c.), from Latin gaudia “expressions of pleasure; sensual delight,” plural of gaudium “joy, inward joy, gladness, delight; source of pleasure or delight,” from gaudere “rejoice,” from PIE root *gau- “to rejoice” (cognates: Greek gaio “I rejoice,” Middle Irish guaire “noble”). Joy is an emotion that we can feel viscerally in our souls when experiencing it. Joy is synonymous with delight, glee, happiness, elation, gladness and peace of mind. We know it when we feel it. You optimize for joy and protect your peace of mind by trusting your joy. Most of us nurture unhealthy relationships and lifestyles just because they are all we’ve ever known or done. When you trust your joy, you gravitate towards what makes you happy and set healthy boundaries for whatever drains your energy.

Change Your Standards, Change Your Life.

April 6, 2024 In Musings 6 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

“We don’t rise to the level of our expectations; we fall to the level of our training.”― Archilochus

To paraphrase the Greek poet Archilochus, ” We don’t rise to the level of our goals or wishes; we rise to the level of our standards.” Our standard determines what we are willing to tolerate and the expectations we hope to live by. One of the standards I have set for myself in the past 2-3 years is doing the following daily: Meditate, write on this blog and exercise. I have tried to uphold that standard for myself daily, but they have become non-negotiables. It took a while to get to this level of consistency, but everything is possible with determination, persistence and focus. We get what we tolerate in life, and our standards are a benchmark onto which the world will treat us.

The Company You Keep.

April 5, 2024 In Musings 6 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Your parents were right “Birds of the same feather flock together”, and “If you lie down with dogs, you get up with fleas”. These are some of the cautious statements parents give to their children on the importance of choosing their friends, relationships and associations. Parents know viscerally because they know in hindsight how the right or wrong association shaped their lives. As the saying goes, “You are the total of the five people you spend the most time with.” You cannot outperform your inner circle as they calibrate your baseline and, ultimately, your threshold. Two of the most crucial relationship decisions we all must make include choosing a life partner and the choice of work. You will spend at least two-thirds of your life with your partner and at work. The company you keep is essential in how far you go in life, so choose wisely.

Tune Out the Noise.

April 4, 2024 In Musings 8 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Noise is an unpleasant sound that is undesired. ¹ Noise can also be anything that does not give us the desired sound signal. One must tune out the noise to listen to one’s intuition/gut. The naysayers are often the loudest. They will tell you with certainty why your goals are impossible and call you crazy. It can be tough, as most of the noise comes from people closest to us. Self-doubt will definitely creep in at some point, but you have to trust yourself and the universe. As American film director and screenwriter Steven Spielberg noted in his 2016 Harvard University Commencement Speech ² “Your Intuition Whispers,” I want to be clear that your intuition is different from your conscience. They work in tandem, but here’s the distinction: Your conscience shouts, ‘here’s what you should do,’ while your intuition whispers, ‘here’s what you could do.’ Listen to that voice that tells you what you could do. Nothing will define your character more than that.

And again, this is why it’s so important to listen to your internal whisper. It’s the same one that compelled Abraham Lincoln and Oskar Schindler to make the correct moral choices. In your defining moments, do not let your morals be swayed by convenience or expediency. Sticking to your character requires a lot of courage. And to be courageous, you’re going to need a lot of support.

Conquer Thy Self.

April 3, 2024 In Musings 4 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Chinese military strategist and author of The Art of War, Sun Tzu, wrote, “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.” The battle to conquer oneself is a life-long journey, as what got you to become good would not necessarily get you to become great. The key is to lose the battle and win the war. The battle never ends with the vicissitudes, trials, and tribulations of life, but by conquering oneself with self-awareness and self-compassion, the war will be won. As Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Carl Jung once said “One who looks outside, dreams. One who looks inside awakens.”

To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Intensity Expands Capacity.

April 2, 2024 In Musings 6 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

I ran six full marathons in 2022 and another nine in 2023, bringing the total marathons I ran in the past two years to fifteen. I participated in my first marathon in 2013 as an avenue to deal with the grief of losing my closest cousin. Finishing that first marathon in Accra, Ghana, took me over five hours. I have since participated in and finished 28+ Marathons in 19 different cities (Accra (4), Toronto (4), Cotonou (1), Lagos (2), Nairobi, Mississauga, Ottawa (2), Montreal (2), Vancouver, Edmonton, Hamilton, Fredericton, Halifax, Calgary, Manitoba, Regina, Quebec, Victoria and Prince Edward Island. I reduced my marathon finish time from 4 hours+ (pre-2021) to 3:44 in 2022 and 3 hours 20 minutes in 2023. It took a lot of intense training and consistency to pull it off, but it was worth the grind.

One More Try.

April 1, 2024 In Musings 5 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Failure is a trickster with a keen sense of irony and cunning. It takes great delight in tripping one when success is almost within reach.

Every day is an opportunity to give your best shot and make progress in achieving your goals. Good better best; never let it rest until good is better, and better is best. The gym is an excellent example of the One More Try mentality; real progress starts when it hurts, and we can feel the pain. Whether running on the treadmill, lifting weights or engaging in other fitness activities, the more we can go beyond our perceived pain threshold, the quicker the progress. Boxing legend and former world heavyweight champion Muhammed Alli was a proponent of this philosophy; he once said: “I don’t count my sit-ups; I only start counting when it starts hurting because they’re the only ones that count.”

“Most people give up just when they’re about to achieve success. They quit on the one-yard line. They give up at the last minute of the game, one foot from a winning touchdown.” – H. ROSS PEROT American billionaire and former U.S. presidential candidate”

The Joy of Solitude.

March 31, 2024 In Musings 6 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

Solitude is from Latin solitudinem (nominative solitudo) and Old French solitude “loneliness” (14c.). It is a state of being alone or remote from society. Most of us got a real glimpse of what it means to be alone for a long period of time during the COVID-19 pandemic lock down. Solitude is different from Loneliness: It involves being alone without feeling lonely, while loneliness is often a state of isolation. As the 2020 pandemic showed, solitude can bring out the best in us through more self-introspection or self-awareness, and it can also make us engage in destructive or negative behaviour that might not be in alignment with our ultimate purpose in life.

Bet on Yourself.

March 28, 2024 In Musings 4 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

American tennis prodigy Venus Williams was offered three million dollars on the eve of her first professional tennis tournament. On the eve of playing her first competitive tournament in three years, a Nike executive spotted an opportunity and offered her a lucrative footwear deal. As per the movie King Richard, the Nike deal was only valid before she played her first game the following day. Venus and her family decided to decline the offer as they believed that once Venus began to play, she would attract more lucrative offers. In the movie, Venus’s father, Richard Williams, said:

“You asking this girl to take all the hard work she done did for the last ten years, and accept the first offer that come through the door?”

Wander but don’t get Lost.

March 27, 2024 In Musings 5 Mins Read By Lanre Dahunsi

It is ok to falter on your goal streak, get distracted and wander for a bit but don’t get lost. It is easy to get distracted in a world where technology, gadgets and streams of data and information are always fighting for our attention. Getting lost in the sea of data on social with the somewhat elusive allure for virality, popularity, and influence can be very tempting. We all get lost in this bubble once in a while but remember why you started this in the first place, the algorithms are not optimized to allow you find your purpose, so wander with care and don’t get lost.